


One Second Too Late

by No1fan15



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Assumed Betrayal, Conflict of Interests, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Internal Conflict, Past Violence, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, Psychological Trauma, Shit goes down bro, Veterans
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-14
Updated: 2016-05-14
Packaged: 2018-06-08 10:59:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6851977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/No1fan15/pseuds/No1fan15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pearl - It was her fault that Jasper escaped. She could explain why she did what she did... couldn't she? </p>
<p>Jasper - It was her fault for failing her mission. She could explain her actions... right? </p>
<p>Everyone else - They would understand... wouldn't they?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Possibly the most angst ridden thing I will have ever written in my life. 
> 
> Post Super Watermelon Island / Gem Drill, canon divergence from there. Background Lapidot. Mainly Jaspearl. Tons of feels.

**Pearl**

_One second too late._

The difference, in her mind, between victory and letting everyone down.

_Her mistake._

Garnet had Steven, Amethyst had grabbed Lapis, and her?

_One second too late._

She had missed.

_Her mistake._

Jasper had fallen into the ocean, despite her best efforts, and now she was gone.

_It was her fault._

Gone to regain strength, and come back one day to kill them, and it was all her fault.

_Her fault._

She put the thought into the back of her mind for the next few days, congratulating Steven on bubbling the Cluster, and the relationship he had healed between Lapis and Peridot.

_One second too late._

But that one, constant, nagging idea still came to her.

_It was her fault._

Jasper was missing.

_It was her fault._

Jasper would be back.

_It was her fault._

Jasper would destroy everyone.

_It was her fault._

This continued for weeks on end, until she could stand it no longer, and she sneaked out of the temple one night.

_It was her fault._

She looked out over the ocean, surveying the waters, searching for the best entry point.

_Her fault._

She dove into the sea, ignoring the cold, lighting up her gem to lead the way.

_Her fault._

She scoured the ocean floor, searching for her enemy, determined to fix what she saw as her mistake.

_Her fault._

When she did eventually find Jasper, ready to capture her, a thought jolted through her mind.

_One second too late_

The quartz warrior lay there, motionless, hair slowly waving in the current.

_One second too late._

A crack ran down her Gem, dark against the pale skin, highlighting the injury.

_One second too late._

Pearl grabbed Jasper by the arm, still steadfast, and started to pull her towards the surface.

_One second too late._

They surfaced into the chilled night air, Pearl gasping for breath, despite not needing to breathe.

_One second too late._

Almost an hour of swimming landed them on what was left of a small island, and they lay on the beach, finally somewhat safe.

_One second too late._

Pearl shot up and checked on her companion, hardly daring to hope that maybe, just maybe she was still able to fight.

_One second too late._

Pearl sighed and curled her arms around her legs, drawing them up to her body, her last dregs of honor preventing her from finishing Jasper off.

_One second too late._

Now all she could do was wait, for there was no warp pad, and prepare to interrogate Jasper once she woke up.

_One second too late._

She looked up at the stars, hoping, that she wouldn't mess up this time.

_Her fault._

She hoped the others wouldn't be upset with her later.

_Her mistake._

She would have to explain why she did what she did.

_Her fault._

They had to understand, didn't they?

_One second too late._


	2. Chapter 2

**Jasper**

_One second too late_

She could feel herself sliding off of.. something.

_One second too late_

She tried to open her eyes, but everything was blurry, and she could barely make out the figure in front of her.

_One second too late_

It was the Pearl, reaching out to her, trying to stop her descent.

_One second too late_

Even though the Pearl was her enemy, self preservation won out in the end, and she tried to reach for the offered hand.

_One second too late_

She couldn't move.

_One second too late_

And then everything was dark again, the now familiar feeling of water surrounding her, preventing any movement.

_Falling_

She could feel herself sinking deeper with every passing second.

_Falling_

Memories of Malachite consumed her mind.

_Falling_

The memories gave way to images from the war.

_Falling_

She was suddenly on the battlefield once again, surrounded by screaming, gem shards at her feet.

_Her fault  
_

The shards of her enemies

_Her fault  
_

The shards of her teammates

_Failure_

The shards of her friends

_It's her fault_

The gems she couldn't save

_It's her fault_

The rebellion, strong as ever, driving her back.

_She lost_

Homeworld retreating

_She lost_

Punishment for failure

_Pain_

The thought of her friends that had depended on her to protect them.

_Pain_

The moments her gem wasn't damaged, but the pain never stopped, and the memories kept coming.

_It's her fault_

All of a sudden, her eyes snapped open, and she struggled to move.

_Trapped_

She coughed up water, trying to look around, but she still couldn't move

_Trapped_

She finally cleared her airways, blinking in the moonlight, water mixing with the unwanted tears on her face.

_Freedom_

She looked to see who had saved her, and quickly wiped the tears off her face, hoping that she didn't see...

_One second too late_

The Pearl stared at her, surprised, and hesitantly drew her spear.

_One second too late_

Jasper tried to lunge at her, but fell to the ground, weak.

_Failure_

" You... your gem is damaged. Don't try to fight back." said the Pearl, voice wavering.

_Failure_

" How much did you see?" Jasper grunted, raising her head off the sand.

_Failure_

" Enough." the Pearl sighed, putting away her weapon. " You're not going to fight me."

_Failure_

" I'm not. Just... leave me be." Jasper muttered, looking away.

_Traitor_

" I'm afraid I can't do that." the Pearl replied, a bit of her old bravado returning.

_Traitor_

" I am not going to fight you. I've failed my mission. I'll be crushed if I return to Homeworld. Just break me now." Jasper murmured.

_Traitor_

" I'm not going to do that either." said the Pearl. " How about we just... talk."

_Traitor_

" Why? So you can remind me of my failures? Of everything that's gone wrong?"

_Traitor_

" How about the war? How my comrades fell, shattered at my feet, and I could do nothing about it?!" Jasper shouted, her anger rising.

_Traitor_

" I want to know why I saved you. I came because of how I felt... how I let everyone down by not capturing you... but now... I still don't want to hurt you, and I don't know why!" the Pearl yelled back at her.

_Why_

The two fell silent for a while.

_Why you_

Jasper looked over at her companion, and noticed tears in her eyes, despite her obvious attempts to look emotionless.

_Why you_

Jasper reached out tentatively, berating herself internally for her actions, and tried to wipe the tears away.

_Why_

The Pearl flinched at first, but then sat still, observing Jasper with a kind of pity that a Pearl should never have.

_Why you_

Silence fell over the beach again, and there the two sat, quietly reflecting on their situation until sunrise.

_Why you_

Jasper realized the reason the Pearl had saved her, but refused to admit it to herself, opting to keep the silence.

_She understands me._


End file.
